As If...
Many people find themselves in a situation where they do not love
or feel "in love" with their spouse.
The most common reaction is to wait until the feelings come before they
act. They often know that love is an action, not just a feeling. But, to
act without the corresponding feelings seems dishonest and they may be
tired of pretending in the relationship. They want to be true to
themselves.
This approach almost guarantees that the relationship will die. Because
of the lack of love, the couple may separate. Without time together, no
bonding will occur. Romance and affection are almost impossible. There is
little hope.
A very different approach is to act first and hope the feelings come
later. This does not seem logical, but it works. You act "as if"
you love the other person. You act "as if" you are in love with
words and actions of affection.
A very high percentage of people find after days or weeks, they no
longer have to act. Those feelings are true and sincere. The relationship
is renewed.
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